I was on my table, surfing through the net, reading up some updates online when this damsel knocked on my door. I looked through the side of the curtain and smiled; do you know why, because she is one of my best female friends in our lodge [Don’t ask me the name, because I won’t tell you right now, even if you would give me 50 bags of rice, I won’t]. I coded as if I didn’t smiled or know that she was the one, I softly asked “who is that?” though I knew she won’t reply. I moved to the outer door of my room [I’m staying downstairs]. She was already drawing the door towards herself in attempt to open it; maybe she wanted to break in [“nwa mpki maalu uzo oba”=> “the little he-goat that knows the road to barn”]. To be sincere, if not that the bae had gotten into another boo’s hand before I met her, she might have been the girl to close up the gap of being single in my life. Her name is Glory [though I said that I won’t tell you], but I called her “Gloria”, sometimes “Groria” playfully notwithstanding the fact that she has corrected me uncountable number of times. She is cute, decent to her own extent, with good characters, she has above 60% of what I desire to see in a girl I love; no more having amatory feelings for her in case someone reading this would be interested.
I unlocked the bolts, she came in, seemed like she was going out to buy something outside the lodge. You know, I am that jocular kind, as normal we started chatting. I was telling her about something I told one girl on Whatsapp group [hey mind you, I’m not a womanizer], baes love me because I am that funny Nonny, I am really humorous, sometimes in an annoying manner, hmmmmm! I love her because she feels free whenever we chat, we are becoming more like siblings than friends, and I know lots of people in the lodge would be conceiving awry thoughts that we are dating [“ka mu nukwa!”=> “make I hear!”]; it would be no doubt that some boys in the lodge gotta be ogling her: she is sexy [I am not lusting after her body; take note].
Her boo’s name is Vine, she loves talking about him hence I have seized that her idiosyncrasy to be telling her about the guy in funny way even when she doesn’t desire to hear me talk about it: he’s fair in complexion, tall and handsome, with natural red lips; he used 10% to escape albinism [hope his bae won’t see this, before I would be in trouble]. Gloria has a promising future, just finished DIPLOMA program in UNIZIK this year, LAW, waiting for both her admission via UTME and via DIPLOMA; so she has seized the time to learn manicure, pedicure, fixing of hairs. In case you need home services, she can be of help [she didn’t pay for advert, so let me cut it short].
We kept chatting, all of a sudden as we were chatting, she asked me if I +The Inspirational Parrot KNOW HOW MUCH THEY ARE SELLING PADS AT THE MOMENT. Oh My Goodness! I looked at her fiercely, I could neither smile nor laugh. But I coded, and make fun of the question, a the case may be, I am a Wit, and good in pun [not porn, hmmmmm]. Anyway, I know why she asked me such question without mincing words, it’s simply because we are more like brother and sister [don’t ask me if it’s brother and sister in Christ]. You so much love gossip eh!
I quickly changed the topic, we started chatting, and she later went out to buy something as I then put more attention on what I was doing on PC, amazingly again, she came back with a pad in black waterproof; finally she really meant the question she asked me, imagine. My dear, it was my own turn to ask her question, so I romantically asked her “PLEASE, HOW MUCH DID YOU LATER BOUGHT THE PAD?”. She laughed and started beating me, though it was playfully [mind you, we did not fall on the bed, because I was still sitting on my table while operating my PC]. Few seconds later, another bae on the door, her name is Precious, her friend and also a DIPLOMA student; she came to return the fetching bucket she collected from me. We all chatted humorously, felt happy, and they both left my room. Phew!
So, my Muse communed with my psyche to put up this experience of mine today. So so happy that I am into writing, not just into writing, but good in it: I think. Hope you enjoyed this piece in form of gossip. What should I call this: “AUTO-GOSSIP”; just like “AUTOBIOGRAPHY”. Anyway, that’s it for this gossip, autogossip rather; I know some persons that would read this would be making some awry imaginations about the whole scenario; some would assume that I hid certain parts of the whole gist: anyway, that’s your own mind, you are free to think of anything you feel like; excuse me please!