Best Valentine Day Jokes: 31 Short Funny Jokes About Valentine’s Day (Number 3, 5, 9, 15, 19, 23, 26 & 30 Would Burst Your Brain)
Best Valentine Day Jokes – A Must Read 31 Short Funny Jokes About Valentine’s Day: Your Valentine’s Day would be lacking something without you reading these short funny jokes.
I have compiled these jokes about Valentine’s day to thrill my fans all over the world and put smiles on the faces of people; especially those ones with ugly faces 😂 🤣
See eh! If you are a married man or woman or in a relationship, and you read these jokes just you alone; I swear, thunder go fire you. Hahahahahahahahahaha; com’on go and bring oga or madam or your lover to come over here to enjoy these jokes with you.
I dey hate nonsense oooooo 🙄, na make you no later come share this post on WhatsApp, Facebook, Twitter, and others, na that time you go know say that Jokes Parrot 🐧 (The Inspirational Parrot) na monitoring spirit. I go do you constipation for 600 days, you won’t feel horny for 600 years… hahahahahahahahaha; Lol! Abeg na joke ooo, not a curse ooo 🙆🏿😂🤣😄
As e still dey hot, make I kukuma allow una to laugh away una sorrows 😭 and heartbreaks 💔😢 (for those who were heartbroken this time around). Enjoy the Short Funny Jokes for Valentine’s Day jollification and be filled with great joy. Hey, MAKE SURE YOU SHARE THIS POST PLEASE: SHARE IT TO FACEBOOK, TWITTER, WHATSAPP, EMAILS, SMS, ETC.
1) Valentine is coming, Assuming the government says, everybody should register their boyfriend/girlfriend, or wife/husband before Feb 14 2019 and you try to register yours and the machine tells you, “sorry the person you are registering has already been registered!!!” What will you do? Share the fun as you become the first person to drop an answer…😂😂😂😂😂
2) My Brothers, if your babe insists she will eat pizza or chocolate on Valentine’s day; tell her to go read Numbers 9:11 in the bible. The scripture is specific on the food to be taken on 14th February. Num 9:11; and it says: “In the second month on the fourteenth day in the evening they shall keep it; they shall eat it with unleavened bread and bitter herbs”. You get it? Henceforth, the law of Moses will prevail 😂😄😄
3) Oya, enjoy this Valentine gbedu Rhyme:
La valentine la come👅
La girls la hot👅
La dick la suck👅
La breast la squeeze well well👅
La pussy la fuck👅
La panties la stolen 👅
La menstrual flow la miss👅
La girl la go pregnancy test👅
La find out la pregnant👅
La call la boyfriend la explain👅
La wht la test la say👅
La boyfriend la hear la cut the call👅
La boy friend la run away👅
La girls career’s la ruined👅
La cry till la deliver👅
Omo la baby la fatherless👅
La baby la no get joy👅
La miscreant la plenty la street👅
La child la lack family love👅
La girls la beware👅
La share to la sisters la girl friends la respect la
self la 14th👅🤝👅
La happy valentine la advancione🤣👅🤣
4) My Valentine’s Day prayers to every unmarried person:
Dear Lord, may all unmarried persons who are planning to have s3x on Valentine Day get pregnant 👶👶 Let no abortion pill work for them. 💊 May all condoms tear miraculously. 🍆🍑 Let no emergency pill work for them. This is my humble prayer to you Lord. 🙌� 😂😂 Can all saints shout a thunderous “Amen” ?? 😜😜😜😜😜😜
5) Finally the first list of girls that will be pregnant this Valentine is out, if you hear your name, please answer present Sir:
If you didn’t see your Name on the first list, wait second list, it would be out soon. Lols 😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄
6) Honey, I’m going for a business trip on the12th and will be back on the 17th after Valentine’s day. Oya, Reply as a Nigerian wife.😁
7) Nnamdi Valentine Vs Village girl enjoying and this happened:
Village girl: You are not wearing a condom?
Valentine: Yes, any problem?
Village girl: Hope you are not HIV positive?
Valentine: No, I am not a baby
Village girl: Good, because i didn’t want to get that thing again.🤣🤣🤣
8) 👨 Because of valentine’s day Gifts, some girls are even apologizing for what they didn’t do wrong. They Be Like ”sweety, I’m Sorry For What Bournemouth did to Chelsea, and I am not forgetting what Man City did to Chelsea as well!” 😂😂😂😂
9) S3x is like a secret cult everybody belongs to, but no one admits being a member except pregnant women; so na only married people are permitted to have s3x on Valentine’s Day oooooo. 🙄🏽♂
10) I spent so much on him, Nigerian girls’ statement after buying 3-in-1 Lux singlet for their boyfriends, but she will never tell you that she removed the free pen that came with it. 😜😜😜😜😜😜
11) I keep hearing everyone saying who will be my Val? My question is what happened to your last Val? Motor Jam am 🤣 Lol
12) Take her for shopping 💑😍 Let her pick any dress for Valentine 😊😊 while she is in fitting room. Leave the shop and go home 😊😂
13) Girls listen to this warning/notice: Guys don’t accept singlet and boxers this valentine. Enough of that rubbish we are not cultural dancers. 😒😒😅😅😅
14) Girls take your Boyfriend out this valentine and pay the bills. You will notice one thing: You will notice that you did not die. 🤣🤣🤣 Guy, hope I dey talk una mind?
15) I am thinking of stealing a bunch of flowers from a nearby grave to surprise my bae on valentine day; is it a good idea help me??!🤔🤔 Who is with me? We will storm graveyard 12 midnight.
16) Behind every married man losing weight, there’s a pregnant side chick threatening to inform his wife 😂😢🏃; Na naked thunder go roast the yansh of any side chick who is making a married man somewhere to be losing weight. 😜😜😜
17) Don’t ask me why I am repeating this particular prayer; just join me in prayers:
Dear Lord, may all unmarried person who are planning to have s3x on Valentine Day get pregnant 👶👶 Let no abortion pill work for them. 💊 May all condoms tear miraculously.🍆🍑 Let no emergency pill work for them; This is my humble prayer to you Lord.🙌� 😂😂 Can all saints shout a thunderous “Amen”? 😜😜😜😜😜😜
18) Valentine’s Day Fact: Sometimes all you need is strong heartbreak to have sense in life ♨ 😒😒
19) Fact 👌🏾👌🏾👌🏾 When the pastor said, “,let him use you”; My sister, he meant God, not Emeka your boyfriend. Take note ♨😌😌😌😌
20) Ask her what she needs for valentine, order it online, put her address and click on “pay on delivery” 😌😌🧘♂🧘♂😌😌
21) Ladies start buying your man Val gifts, stop giving dem pvssy as Val gift; you can’t give someone something that’s already open; Abeg who know me for back of head? 😬😂🏃🏻🏃🏻🏃🏻🏃🏻
22) Vals day is not Christmas; so stop asking everyone you see around for your vals day gift 🤭 🤭🤭 Leave us, the innocent ones alone. Is it our fault that you don’t have boyfriends??🏃🏾♂🏃♂🏃♂🏃♂🏃♂🏃♂
23) I will keep on repeating this particular prayer: Dear Lord! May all Unmarried person who are planning to have s3x on Valentine Day get pregnant 👶👶 Let no abortion pill work for them. 💊 May all condoms tear miraculously.🍆🍑 Let no emergency pill work for them. This is my humble prayer to you Lord.🙌� 😂😂 Can all saints shout a thunderous “Amen”? 😜😜😜😜😜😜
24) This coming Valentine, I just need a girl that will look into my eyes and tell me: Baby just take my pant; use it and make us proud. 👏👏
25) 👨 Guys haven’t you noticed that ladies are now so NICE. Valentine don dey reach. Guard your Account balance my fellow MEN.😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠👨🏽
26) Valentine is here again, when short girls 👧 would wear red gown and be looking like fire extinguisher 😂 😂 😂
27) This Valentine’s Day, I want to surprise my girlfriend 👧 by showing her my real girlfriend 👧😂 😂 😂, I hope the girl I a, crushing on won’t see this one oooooo.
28) What’s up bae, when are u coming for your Valentine’s day gift? This statement has produced lot of babies 👶 and will still produce some this year. 😂 😂 😂
29) The Federal Ministry of Finance warns that any guy who claims ATM isn’t working on the 14th of February is liable to die BR😂KE; and likewise, the Federal Ministry of Health warns that any girl claiming to be on her period on the said date (14th of February), is liable to bleed to death. 😂 😂 😂 Yesu, dem wan mob me ooooo, abeg na joke nah. 😜😜😜😜
30) Happy alentines ay to all of you oooooo! For those who are not getting the V and the D (That is what each of them stands for), I am sorry, you are not old enough to know. If you know, you know. 😄😄😄 😜😜
31) Instead of you to buy her valentine gift on the 14th why not give her the money; Make she pay people wey she dey owe 🤷🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️🤓🤓🤓
Now you don laugh finish, abeg Which of the numbers burst your brain, tell us in the comment section below.
Now that you have enjoyed these short funny jokes specially compiled for Valentine’s Day laughter; make sure you share this post with others, use the share buttons below.
Hey! The fun is not yet over, there are still lots OTHER SHORT FUNNY JOKES on this website; we no dey only dey bombard our readers with gist, songs, videos, etc.; we also make them happy through our SHORT FUNNY JOKES SECTION.
Happy Valentine’s Day to all of you!